I’ve coached number of executives and they all made the same confession at the end.
“Syed, I wish someone had shown me these 3 traps a decade ago.”
So let me save you 10 years of wasted potential by exposing the three silent killers that quietly steal the best years of your life.
1. The Identity Trap
This is the deadliest trap of them all.
It happens when you confuse what you DO with who you ARE.
The symptoms appear innocent at first:
– “I’m a perfectionist”
– “I’m just not creative”
– “I’m the reliable one”
But these identity labels become self-reinforcing prisons. They create boundaries you won’t cross because doing so would threaten your sense of self.
The hack: Start noticing when you say “I am” versus “I choose to.” Your actions are choices, not your identity.
2. The Validation Trap
This trap occurs when your need for external validation becomes the invisible driver of your decisions.
You know you’re caught when:
– You feel anxious when people disagree with your choices
– Your mood depends on feedback from others
– You avoid risks that might lead to criticism
The hack: Before major decisions, ask yourself: “Would I make this same choice if no one would ever know about it?”
3. The Narrative Trap
Humans are storytelling machines.
The narrative trap occurs when you create stories about what events “mean” without realizing they’re just interpretations.
This manifests as:
– “I wasn’t promoted because they don’t value loyalty”
– “My business failed because the market wasn’t ready”
– “She didn’t return my call because she’s upset with me”
The hack: Separate observable facts from your interpretation of those facts.
Ask: “What actually happened, and what story am I adding?”
These 3 traps share one thing in common: they operate below conscious awareness. That’s why even the smartest, most successful people get caught in them.
The first step to breaking free?
Recognizing when you’re caught.
If you’re struggling to pinpoint which trap is holding you back, comment below. I’ll help you personally DM you , uncover the patterns and give you further detailed tips to break free.
